I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

[bungie]

Speaking personally, I was raped when I was 13 years old by an older man (30s) who I assumed 'loved' me, told me he was my 'boyfriend', and wanted to 'take care of me', and I made the conscious decision to give myself to him. Now as a 29 year old woman I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person who lied to me, coerced me, made me false promises, deceived and tricked me and has detrimentally altered my life and interpersonal relationships with men. My innocence, my youth and my childhood was stolen from me.

Just what I was talking about (prejudice sinks from hate)
1: Because of the way you feel - your anger and hate - for being left alone - you blame. Simply everybody in your eyeglasses are now sick and evil people if they like girls in their puberty.
2: When he left you - the good relationship and all the fun you had together - went from love to rape and anger. The second blame.
3: This will be repeated forever.

So, basically, you are telling me that I shouldn't feel this way and I should be happy that an older man took advantage of me then 'dumped' me after he took my virginity

Dear. I dumped a girl around that age too once. She came to me drunk on a party. After we got a relationship, I meet another girl at same age. I got a relationship with her too. That count relationship with two girls. I had with them both every day for some weeks, untill one day, the other came too see me kissing the other. Dramatic. The day after she came to me and asked 'why' - and she started crying, standing with her arms folded out, the tears drained from her eyes - and she asked again 'why'. Me? I was just laughing. She wrote me one last love-letter, posted same day. Above the undersigned; She kept one picture (yes! she still loved me a bit), but in the bottom there where some evil words written, about an large a*-hole. Confused maybe. The other girl? we had relationship a few months untill she found a new guy, and I a new girl. Was it ruthless? No. Girls do this too. And it didn't take long before the crying girl found a new boyfriend, and she started kissing him, after taking a good look into my eyes. You see, she wanted to make sure, I knew. Just a year later I had a similar issue, got a girlfriend that didn't want to have sex. Even after weeks, no she wanted to wait. Guess what happened. I had with her own bestfriend on a party. She just wanted to know why, but it was okay - it was her friend. And they are bestfriends even today.

My advice; You shouldn't care. You should simply found another guy, and played the game. Never suffer yourself for anything. We love you - just play it and get some darkness within yourself. The world population count more than 6 billion. We have a serious luxury problem sitting here with Internet, cookies, good music and everything. Most people live in hell.

But let me guess; What you actually did, was driving around in his car listening to club-music like Fragma, Melanie C et.c. Toca me, I Turn to You. Always a good hit beside from TV-series as Buffy the Vampire Slayer and similiar.. experienced guess?

[StingX]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Dear. I dumped a girl around that age too once. She came to me drunk on a party. After we got a relationship, I meet another girl at same age. I got a relationship with her too. That count relationship with two girls. I had with them both every day for some weeks, untill one day, the other came too see me kissing the other. Dramatic. The day after she came to me and asked 'why' - and she started crying, standing with her arms folded out, the tears drained from her eyes - and she asked again 'why'. Me? I was just laughing. She wrote me one last love-letter, posted same day. Above the undersigned; She kept one picture (yes! she still loved me a bit), but in the bottom there where some evil words written, about an large a*-hole. Confused maybe. The other girl? we had relationship a few months untill she found a new guy, and I a new girl. Was it ruthless? No. Girls do this too. And it didn't take long before the crying girl found a new boyfriend, and she started kissing him, after taking a good look into my eyes. You see, she wanted to make sure, I knew. Just a year later I had a similar issue, got a girlfriend that didn't want to have sex. Even after weeks, no she wanted to wait. Guess what happened. I had with her own bestfriend on a party. She just wanted to know why, but it was okay - it was her friend. And they are bestfriends even today.

Good god. I sure ****ing hope that you are just some really bored guy that comes onto random boards and posts bullshit like this just to get a rise out of people.

If this is true, then you are a total prick. That is all.

[boredjedi]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Oh I didn't see someone already carried over this discussion. I deleted my new topic and will post my response here then.

I'm not going to hit on every point in this at first to make the reading simpler to digest.

As for lazymom's first post delving into the laws of the land, just because it's a law doesn't mean it's just or good law. Case in point http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2833
Oh and here's another ramification of this witch hunt http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/33 ... -help.html.

And this http://jonathanturley.org/2009/08/17/te ... stfeeding/

Alt link
http://www.dallasobserver.com/2003-04-1 ... ur-arrest/

You may also find this article of interest http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1187829 ... =Moving-On

Basically we've created a modern day Salem. Witch hunting and it doesn't stop there. America with it's sexually repressive society has infected the rest of the world it seems too.


Where and when will it end I ask you.

This is the most twisted argument I have ever heard. People suffer psychological ramifications of actions put upon them, forced upon them when they are too young to make educated decisions and unaware of how it will affect their lives. Modern society is not set up to emotionally or mentally support children in sexual situations and these children are not emotionally mature, physically capable, or financially equipped to support the ramifications of sexual relationships or child rearing as the outcome of these situations. STRICTLY BIOLOGICALLY SPEAKING a pregnancy takes an enormous toll on a mother's body. A child pregnancy ends up messing with the child's development and growth and ultimately correlates with earlier death and worse outcome for both infants and the mother/child.

FYI: I am more than just a mother, I am actually a counseling psychologist who does part time mental health therapy while going to school.

No one tells a person to suffer. No one coaches the child who has "consensually" agreed to sex with an adult to have emotional problems later on in life. No one tells that 11, 12, 13 year old who is giving their body over to an older man to have nightmares and problems with adult attachment when she turns 30 or 40. However this is the REALITY of the outcome of these relationships. It is medically and clinically documented and I see it in my own work on a daily basis.

What do you see as an adult having sex with a child? Do you see a young innocent girl who you can impose your will upon? Do you see an innocent girl who you can 'teach'? Do you see a flower you can 'pluck'?

All of these are imposing your own will upon someone who cannot make an educated decision to engage in such activities with you as 11, 12, 13 year olds SIMPLY DO NOT POSSESS THE LIFE EXPERIENCE NECESSARY to understand the full ramifications and consequences of such an activity and how it will impact them later on in life.

Back in the days when 11, 12, 13 year olds were having sex with older men, they were also expected to run households and take care of children created from the union. They were not educated, they were not given any formal training in math or literature, they were expected to have children and run the household. Our society is not like that anymore, and has adjusted accordingly with its' laws to protect minors who are expected to get educations and focus on being productive members of society - not pop out kids and run households. We do not raise our children from birth to make more children, but to be educated and work, and mature first.

You have no conscious idea of what this does to a child who has been in these circumstances. All you can see is your own desire and lust. You are entirely selfish to rape children in this way who are not equipped in this society to make these decisions in an educated fashion with a comprehension of what it will do to them in the long term.

And who do you blame for this about the life experience? I say it solely lays in the laps of the parents. Sexual repression in society is the real culprit here. Parents in most part never talk to their kids about sex and relationships until it's too late thinking they'll leave such discussion to sex ed classes in school. Not the way to go. Parents need to start stepping up and take responsibility and stop falling back on that someone else in society will talk to them and teach them. It's like like blaming those violent video games on all of societies woes in terms of youth violence. Poppy cock.

Speaking personally, I was raped when I was 13 years old by an older man (30s) who I assumed 'loved' me, told me he was my 'boyfriend', and wanted to 'take care of me', and I made the conscious decision to give myself to him. Now as a 29 year old woman I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person who lied to me, coerced me, made me false promises, deceived and tricked me and has detrimentally altered my life and interpersonal relationships with men. My innocence, my youth and my childhood was stolen from me. No one TOLD me to feel this way, I came to these emotions only through my own self-exploration and therapy that I went through because I could not form attachments with men or reach orgasm.

So, basically, you are telling me that I shouldn't feel this way and I should be happy that an older man took advantage of me then 'dumped' me after he took my virginity, instead of waiting until I was more mature and able to deal with sex? Isn't that a bit what you said regarding people telling children to 'suffer' so they'll give a message that underage sex is wrong?

I don't understand that first paragraph. Was it rape or consent on your part? Would it have made you feel any better if it was a boy your own age at the time that just wanted the same thing just your virginity and then dumped you? Just asking. But again your case is a prime example of lack of parental discussion about such things. You would have benefited in either case from such a discussion.

I went through because I could not form attachments with men or reach orgasm.

You'll find that in our modern day society that's happening to more and more women irregardless of circumstances almost to the point of epidemic it might already be an epidemic. You'll find that with the rise of Feminism women are becoming more and more bitter and unhappy about their lives and sexuality and on average don't want sex. Research it yourself and you'll find out. IMO it's the main reason you see more and more men being attracted to the younger women who don't suffer from such an ailment yet. Reminds me of that Shakespeare quote "The fault lies not in the stars but in ourselves".

[bungie]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

If this is true, then you are a total prick. That is all.

That's an american opinion I guess. You should wake up from sleep guys. Welcome to Europe Stingy ;) should visit some clubs and afterparties.

[StingX]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

If this is true, then you are a total prick. That is all.

That's an american opinion I guess. You should wake up from sleep guys. Welcome to Europe Stingy ;) should visit some clubs and afterparties.

You think this is an American opinion?
Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know that it was a European tradition to treat fellow people like dirt.

And someone for the love of Sportacus delete this ****ing post.
I know I shouldn't be contributing to this guy's trolling, but I can't keep myself from it.

[bungie]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know that it was a European tradition to treat fellow people like dirt.

It's dumping a girl. Doesn't mean she is treated as dirt. The numbers of sexual partners average is 9. Someone must be dumped. Dosen't mean the dumpers are evil rapists..

I know I shouldn't be contributing to this guy's trolling, but I can't keep myself from it.

We would like lazymom to have her say. There is no trolling here.

[boredjedi]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Let's touch upon the liars now.

[youtube]IENqgCJcau0[/youtube]

http://gothamist.com/2009/11/12/belgian ... iaison.php


There's plenty of other examples of this as well. Who's the victim again?

It's getting to the point where you'll have to id everyone you're going to sleep with make copies of their ids and keep charts and records and signed documents by the prospective partners stating that everything they tell you is the truth just like in a doctor's office so in case the authorities do come calling you have records and proof just for protection against such shenanigans.


Stingy, you may not like what bungie has to say but he does raise some valid points no reason to go on hell bender calling him names and such. Lazymom is an adult and I'm sure she's more than capable of handling herself.


Witch hunting.

[moonblayd]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

you may not like what bungie has to say but he does raise some valid points

Everything bungie posts is moronic dribble. Not a single thing he says is valid. I'm almost tempted not to read them for fear that some of his stupid may rub off on me.

[boredjedi]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

you may not like what bungie has to say but he does raise some valid points

Everything bungie posts is moronic dribble. Not a single thing he says is valid. I'm almost tempted not to read them for fear that some of his stupid may rub off on me.

Instead of just calling them moronic quote them and give us some examples on your thoughts about his comments so we all have something to go on. He has his opinions as do you let's hear them. This way we all have a chance to rebut him as well as well as your on replies on this matter.

[LazyPooky]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Let's touch upon the liars now.

[youtube]IENqgCJcau0[/youtube]

Children of that age want to pretent that they are older because the adult fase to them is much funner. I bet she had not the sex thing in mind. All they talk is about the myspace in this video, but when he actually met her he probably acted like a preditor.
Come on, you must be pretty stupid to not be able to distinguish between a 13 year old and a 20 year old, psysically and mentally.

[boredjedi]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Let's touch upon the liars now.

[youtube]IENqgCJcau0[/youtube]

Children of that age want to pretent that they are older because the adult fase to them is much funner. I bet she had not the sex thing in mind. All they talk is about the myspace in this video, but when he actually met her he probably acted like a preditor.
Come on, you must be pretty stupid to not be able to distinguish between a 13 year old and a 20 year old, psysically and mentally.

Excuse me wasn't it Chris Hansen who used 18 year olds to trap pedos because they acted and looked younger than they were? I think the answer is yes. I've seen plenty of young girls that you'd have sworn they were in the late teens based on their behavior and looks especially with the Hispanics. So in answer to your comment no it's not always easy to distinguish between legal and illegal ages simply based on character and looks.

Also did you listen to that youtube article. The girl is still out late and partying according to the parents. Not to mention she did it to another guy before him. Pretending? No she's just a trouble maker and is still allowed to get away with it by the parents and society.

[bungie]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

The case is a prime example of lack of parental discussion about such things.

Like to quote this - and it's true. Parental discussion about sex, either by male or female is important. Both parents discussing might be embarrassing as it form a group. If you have a dad talking about sex - telling he had sex with several girls, and got fined for speed-driving is good guidance. He may tell you to speed down, but you will not do. And can anything be better than being invited by the girls own parents for sleepover, even she is 14. Talk, eating dinner.. it's good!. If not - the girl will hide herself, because she is afraid being punished. That may bring traumatic events.

Everything bungie posts is moronic dribble. Not a single thing he says is valid.

But it is valid.

[LazyPooky]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

I have to say I go with Moonblayd's opinion about the moronic dribble and doubtfull valid points. We had this discussion earlier btw, the topic I closed. I stay on what I said earlier and my advise is to read that book.
viewtopic.php?p=53269#p53269

[bungie]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

I have to say I go with Moonblayd's opinion about the moronic dribble and doubtfull valid points.

Smart girl this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5CYfOeFbuw
Still love you

Let me back-up boredjedi's statement - and the valid points:

1 in 5 Teenagers Has Sex Before 15, Study Finds
About 20 percent of adolescents have had sexual intercourse before their 15th birthday -- and one in seven of the sexually experienced 14-year-old girls has been pregnant.

One in seven has been pregnant.

The study found that only about a third of parents of sexually experienced 14-year-olds knew that their children were having sex -- and while most parents said they had spoken to their young adolescent children about sex, far fewer teenagers reported having had such conversations with their parents.

It is important to talk about. But please, one parent - two form the embarrassing group. And give money to contraceptive pills.

The report found that young teenagers have ample opportunity to have sex. About half of 14-year-olds have attended a party with no adult supervision, and about a third said that within the last three months, they had lain on a bed or couch alone with someone they liked. From half to three-quarters of the experienced 12- to 14-year-olds said they had used contraception the first time they had sex.

Alone with someone they liked.

According to the report, many of those who lose their virginity before age 15 have had sex sporadically. One of the studies found that 4 in 10 of the sexually experienced young people had had sex in the 18 months preceding the survey

You know - now and then - here and there.

More girls than boys say yes to sex before 16
Twice as many girls as boys lose their virginity before they turn 16, a survey has revealed. The poll shows a third of girls have sex before the legal age of consent, compared with one in six boys.

Girlpower.

The survey suggests the hard-drinking, casual-sex obsessed 'ladette' culture has now reached girls in their early teens. Less than half of those polled said they lost their virginity because they were in love.

Crude manner and engage in heavy drinking sessions.

The YouGov survey also asked those aged 35 and over to rate their sex lives. One in five said their sex life was only 'average' and one in 20 described the act itself as 'boring'.

Did i mention rockstars?

The rise in underage sex has also led to an increase in sexually-transmitted diseases with 750,000 cases reported last year.

750,000 with chlamydia, herpes.., but in UK.

A third of respondents said they had slept with between two and five sexual partners, a quarter had had between six and ten, and one in seven said they had slept with as many as 20. Three per cent of the men surveyed claimed to have had more than 100 sexual partners.

Substract some - men are always lying about this.

Litterature:
The New York Times
Daily Mail

[StingX]

Re: I feel used, hurt, taken advantage of by a sick evil person

Alright. I do agree that children should be taught about sex BEFORE hormones kick in and they decide to find out themselves. I would say that in the US, children are taught about sex in school when they are about 14 or 15. A decent age, but it could be better. I think 11 or 12 should be when they are taught.

Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know that it was a European tradition to treat fellow people like dirt.

It's dumping a girl. Doesn't mean she is treated as dirt. The numbers of sexual partners average is 9. Someone must be dumped. Dosen't mean the dumpers are evil rapists..

Dumping a girl doesn't mean you treat her like dirt, but let me point out the things that you do to make you a total ass.

Dear. I dumped a girl around that age too once.

You had a relationship with a 13 year old? You're a real winner.

She came to me drunk on a party.

Oh, AND you take advantage of drunk people. Again, makes you a real winner.

I meet another girl at same age.

More badassery.

I got a relationship with her too. That count relationship with two girls.

TOTAL dick move.

I had with them both every day for some weeks, untill one day, the other came too see me kissing the other. Dramatic. The day after she came to me and asked 'why' - and she started crying, standing with her arms folded out, the tears drained from her eyes - and she asked again 'why'. Me? I was just laughing.

As if it was bad enough that you were cheating, (I won't even mention that it was with two 13 year olds), but when one finds out and is obviously upset, all you can do is laugh? Asshole move.

Just a year later I had a similar issue

Oh you mean this wasn’t an isolated incedent? Not surprised. Asshole.

got a girlfriend that didn't want to have sex. Even after weeks, no she wanted to wait. Guess what happened. I had with her own bestfriend on a party.

Is that all life is to you? Sex? Does companionship mean nothing? Didn’t think so. TOTAL asshole move.

She just wanted to know why, but it was okay - it was her friend. And they are bestfriends even today.

The very ****ing LEAST you could do is admit that it was wrong. But no, you think it was ok. Dumbass.

As you can see, just about every sentence makes you like a total dick. And when you put all of them together……oh boy. Yup. You’re a real cool guy.

Oh, and boredjedi, I am against entrapment of pedophiles like the to catch a predator crap that NBC does, and I do think that men who sleep with girls that lie about their age should be let of the hook. I am not part of this witchhunt. If a man is attracted to a minor, big ****ing deal. The second that he acts upon those urges, not cool.